There were times when Daynoren thought the past half-year had gone by all too slowly, dragging reluctantly towards what could be a happy day or another disappointment. There were other times when he thought it had sped by so quickly that it seemed like yesterday he'd sent his brother to his new home and new dragon-bond, and he didn't know where all his time had gone. Today was one of those days where it was the latter, and he wished he had a little more time, even if it meant being bored in yet another history class, or faking a smile at those annoying Water kits, or ignoring his aunt's verbal barbs at anther dinner.

When Daynoren woke, fairly early, he didn't know why his stomach was in a knot. He lay in bed for a long time, like he usually did, but this time, rather than just enjoying the luxury of lying abed and composing himself for the day, he was trying to decide just what he wasn't quite remembering that was making him feel stressed already. He hadn't had any nightmares, he never mistook how those made him feel, and he wasn't uncomfortable. He wasn't due for a Familial Visit with his aunt; he'd already done that for this week. There wasn't a test coming up in any of his classes, though those never really made him worry, anyway. In fact, there wasn't even class scheduled for today, because--

Ah. That must be it.

The first bonding meeting was tonight, and Daynoren wasn't feeling any more confident about it this time than he had last time. In fact, if anything, he felt less confident. He had spent the past six months among the dragonets who he had failed to win over in the three days allotted, taking classes with them, and meals with them whenever he wasn't invited to join his brother or commanded to join his aunt. Though he now knew all the dragonets by name, none of them felt they really knew him. Though he had maintained the casual friendships he'd begun on those three days and even made a few more, none of them were deep enough to warrant bonding: he knew it and they knew it. So, unless there were dragons who were showing up for the first time tonight, he had the sinking feeling that he would, again, be left standing. At least six months ago he had, had hope.

Finally, disgusted with himself for wallowing in self-pity, Daynoren dragged himself out of bed. He was supposed to meet Catame, Tantra, and Frux for lunch, and it was surely at least midmorning already. Since he had no reason to wake himself up any earlier, with no class to attend even if he had remembered that a bit belatedly, he had slept in a little further than was his wont. Among Daynoren's many bad habits, the love of sleeping in was a large one, and at home, he rarely had the opportunity, with servants always hustling him up for breakfast or tutors, or to see his father on the rare occassions he actually wanted to see them.

Staring into the mirror a moment at his sleep-disheveled hair and sleepy, green eyes, Daynoren thought about the past six months, rather than thinking about the next thirty-six hours. It had really been a very nice time, for the most part. The classes were far more interesting than the tutoring he had been subjected to at home, even if they weren't all that much more difficult, and even then, when he hinted at boredom to the teachers, they always found extra challenges to keep him occupied. There were plenty of people-- dragons, really, but they were "people", too-- to talk to and share jokes with and impress, when he needed to impress someone. Perhaps the best part was that there was magic literally everywhere, giving the whole city a faint glow to other-senses. Though Daynoren's primary magic lay within himself, like dragons, he could at least see magic elsewhere, even manipulate it, if he felt like it, and having so much of it just sitting on hand, waiting to be used or just to bask in, was a very comforting feeling.

That was certainly his favorite of his classes, as well: magic. Though he loved Kaur dearly, and respected her knowledge, she couldn't work the kind of magic he could, and so couldn't teach it quite as well as she could teach Catame in his magic. The dragons were more like him, and so could teach by example as well as through theory. It was certainly a heady experience to impress dragon teachers with his magical ability, when he'd been told all his life that dragons were the most powerful mages on Avengaea. The thought that he was keeping up with the best of them in the magic classes, even surpassing some, made him feel quite satisfied with life in general.

Of course, not everything was perfect. His room was dismally bare, even after he'd brought in a decorative rug and a small, somewhat musty wall-hanging, and really rather small. He was the only human attending the non-bonding classes, and when he had classes with those of his own species, they were all bonded, and happily so, which was not conducive to him being overly friendly with them, if just to save his pride-- besides, other than his brother, they were all off-worlders. The meals, though good, were usually of a fairly simple fare, and he was still not allowed wine. Even though his aunt served wine at his weekly Familial Visit, he was usually too distracted by Dana's chilling looks and arch conversation, and Catame's general misery, to enjoy it.

And there was Catame. Most of the time he seemed giddily happy, as if he couldn't quite believe his good fortune, but some of the time he was tense and worried, enough to make Daynoren and Kaur both worry, and he still tired easily. The fact that his aunt and brother were at odds didn't make the boy comfortable, and it was even worse when she continued to ignore the dragons, not inviting them to the Familial Visits or engaging them in conversation when she actually was presented with them face to face. Frux obviously didn't like her, and made little effort to conceal that fact, but it hurt Tantra, and when Tantra was sad, so was Catame. Daynoren only saw his brother in classes, Familial Visits, and the occasional shared meal at the weyr, which was a far cry from the constant time they'd spent together at the manor; he felt almost like he'd lost the little boy he loved. That was another reason Daynoren desperately hoped he'd bond this time: he wanted to move to the weyr, himself, to be with Catame more.

All right, so maybe this train of thought wasn't any more beneficial than the first. Besides, it all came back to what would happen over the next four days, anyway, so why bother avoiding it? Yes, he was anxious, and yes, he was tense. The jealousy for Catame and Tantra had not gone away; it had only lessened with the hope Aloia had given him, to manageable proportions. Even then, though, it gnawed on him if he let it. A bond would make that feeling go away, because then there would be nothing to envy that he didn't have, himself.

Not that, that was the only reason he wanted to "succeed" this time, as his aunt put it, just one of many. The thought of what Dana would say if he "failed" again was enough to make him frown, not a pleasant expression; if she were really in a mood, she would probably threaten to disinherit him, and their father would never be able to stand up to her. There was always the hope, though small, that he might somehow please Darkil Danui if he did what his aunt so fiercely wanted. Mostly, though, the thought of having a partner was enchanting: he could have someone as close to him as his brother, yet who was an equal rather than someone to protect; they would work magic together, for even the most mundane of the dragons had some magical talent; and he would never be alone. That was what everyone wanted, after all, wasn't it?

With a sigh, Daynoren turned away from the mirror and searched through his wardrobe for some clothes suitable for a lunch-before-the-big-night. He didn't have any more time for thinking; he had to meet Catame. There would be plenty of time to worry after lunch, and then no more time, at all, because then it would be time.